Hello and welcome back! I appreciate you taking the time to check out the blog, I pray
these posts blesses and encourages you. This is another transparency post I feel led to
create after viewing The Forge, a great movie I highly recommend checking out, it
blessed me and helped me to realize something about myself that I was unconscious of
for too long. Lets get into it:
As someone who’s viewed movies a plenty, read copious amounts of stories, I’ve come
to expect the basic plotline of events whenever I sit down to view a movie. Normally
there’s a moment of realization of a need, a conflict, a climax, and more often than not a
positive or neutral ending. Sometimes there’s a twist, sometimes there’s more than one
conflict, sometimes there no happy ending. Yet throughout the duration of engaging in a
story you can normally tell how it’ll end. At least…that’s the mindset I had going into The
Forge.
I’ll be honest, I expected a larger conflict than what occurred during the movie.
Something traumatizing or devastating, and to avoid spoilers I won’t say what goes on,
but what I expected to happen…didn’t. I was thoroughly surprised by the outcome of the
movie, the pacing and conflict resolution. Driving home I reflected on why I had this
expectation of doom and gloom and the Lord helped me to realize that I often times fall
into pessimistic thinking. Now for those who don’t know pessimism is the opposite of
optimism, where optimism looks on the positive side of things (glass half full),
pessimism thinks on the negative side of things (glass half empty).
The Lord reminded me of times when I’ve expected a bad, or a neutral outcome, and
how as I’ve grown older, I’ve come to expect as much. He reminded me that not too
long ago when I first started attending my church (CDP Casa De Pacto check below for
links and info), I was coming out of a rough season. I’d gone way off the narrow road,
and maybe I’ll go into more detail in another transparency post, but long story short I
was a mess spiritually and emotionally, while masking it physically. I went up for an altar
call one Sunday and the woman of the house, Apostle Luz ministered to me, and she
said, “God says this season He’s bringing you into won’t be like the last one.” She had
no idea that inside, amidst my repentance and my prayer for God’s help, I made it up in
my heart that should more suffering and heart ache come, I’d take it and I’d be ready for
it. That if God had that in store for me soon, it was well deserved and would help me in
the long run. That no matter how badly it hurt I wouldn’t stray from God again. Yet when
she ministered the word of the Lord to me it broke me down. I was expecting bad things
from a good God.
Yes, I was expecting to be broken, but I didn’t expect it to be the promise of peace and
healing that would bring me to my knees.
Fast forward to now, I asked God, “Why is it I seem to not expect a good outcome? Why
do I expect something bad or neutral to happen in life?” And the Lord reminded me of
my past of experiencing empty promises, and He showed me how as a defense
mechanism against disappointment, I stopped getting my hopes up. Doing this over the
years from my youth and even to now I unconsciously ruled out good outcomes for
myself. I could accept that blessings and the goodness of God could find others, that
their needs would be met, but for me? Not so much. I was shocked, as I thought I was
strong in my faith, that I had enough faith to bolster the faith of others. While that may
be true, its when it comes to me that it seems my faith faltered. This was a revelation, a
reflection of my heart that God showed me through watching The Forge.
I know that suffering, trials and tribulation are one of few things promised us in this life,
but as I had to be reminded weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the
morning. Yes, we will have valley moments, times where we feel like we’re at our
lowest, but we will also have mountain top moments. As the Word of God says in
Ecclesiastes 3 (NIV) verse 4 “A time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a
time to dance, a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them”. Verse 8 states “a
time for war and a time for peace”. This reminded me of how important it is to meditate
on the Word of God, because as Proverbs 23:7 states “For as he thinketh in his heart,
so is he…” meaning if you think pessimistically, you’ll be pessimistic or negative
regarding life and the things of life. Yet if you cling to the promises of God, you’ll
remember that the Lord is our Sheperd and we lack nothing (Psalm 23:1), that He is our
ever present and well-proven help in trouble (Psalm 46:1), and that the peace of God
which transcends all understanding will guard our hearts and minds in Christ Jesus
(Philippians 4:6-7).
I want to encourage you that if you too have been a conscious or unconscious
pessimistic thinker, fill yourself with the promises of God, they will affirm and encourage
you. Meditate on the Word, and pray that God help you to release any and all
pessimistic mindsets and that He helps you to exercise your faith. Remember we don’t
lean on our own understanding, but in all our ways we ought to acknowledge God
(Proverbs 3:5-6), know that we don’t walk by sight, but by faith (2 Corinthians 5:7).
I pray this post blesses you, as it challenged and blessed me. Until next time!
–JB
Rnt with JB 